78 Comments

A dash of pepper works well

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Definitely! But I like it much more than Paula does, so tend to add lashings of it on the plate ;-)

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Damn, I thought _I made pretty good mash, but now I see that I have a long way to go! Next time I’ll try your method. Me, I don’t think I have a standout “thing”, but I do make a consistently good cappuccino (not full coffee nerd level, but getting that way), though I think a good bit of that is down to quality beans and hand grinding and pressing the coffee.

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I've never quite got the point of having a machine that'd enable me to do that... I think partly because the hope of a good cup of coffee is one of the few things that'll lure me out of the house, which I know I need to do once in a while.

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I’ll happily say my abilities in the kitchen are higher than average, but specifically only when I’m not using a recipe or being thoughtful with scale. If I go to the markets and get a hunk of meat I will think of something fascinating to do with it and end up with an outrageously good dinner (serves 9) with 5 serves of the side. This is less useful than you’d think because I have a household of 2, but happily the above talent extends to an ability to reshape leftover items into something new and also tasty.

If I use a recipe it’s usually acceptable but conceptually disappointing in some way, like doing a paint by numbers stencil and putting it up on the wall. Yes, it’s done, but nobody really needs to see that.

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I love that final description :-) Sounds like you cook very much like my wife, who has the ability to just grab something and throw random things in and it come out great... but sometimes gets off results from recipes (often, she'll admit, because she didn't read it beforehand and so is missing several ingredients). I like to start with a recipe as a kind of baseline, and then develop from there...

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Now… not that I'm one to disagree on most things… but

Did you salt your water first? That's not in the description. I can smell when boiling potatoes have not had the water salted. It makes them smell earthy & all is lost at that point. You can never add it later, it just doesn't work [I don't have the chemistry chops but it's an actual chemical distinction.] There was one time when my partner seriously questioned whether I can actually smell salt. Errmmm… no.

After that, just pour off the water - use two or three tilts of the pan, lid canted, as it seems to hide somewhere in between. No steaming required, just use potatoes that don't turn to slop. [idk Russets, being a Brit, but King Eddies will do.]

Mash like buggery, pretty much as described above, but don't over-mash. Kills them stone dead & turns them from actual mash into that revolting stuff restaurants serve - potato puree, which is another word for slimy wallpaper paste.

Mash until everything is one homogenous texture & starting to crack slightly as you squeeze through the masher, forming 'broken worms'. Keep on going until that propensity to crack no longer happens - this is part-way towards the wallpaper paste, but you stop as soon as each masher-squeezed 'worm' properly retains its integrity. Done. Serve. Don't leave it or the starches will continue to change & the texture will firm up. It will do this with or without butter; it's that chemistry thing again. You can fully test this by leaving them without butter to go cold. This is where bubble & squeak starts from, in a similar way to day-old-rice for fried rice.

Butter optional, it just doesn't really need it. It does need good gravy.

Mashers at dawn in defence of this method over any other.

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Hmm. Very interesting. Someone else said I was talking more about "creamed" potatoes than mash. And another person mentioned the salt in the water, too. I'm going to have to try making them your way and see what I think... thank you!

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Welcome! Let me know if it works for you.

Back in my 20s [I'm just a couple of years older than you, so this is a while ago] I lived with a chef above a hotel kitchen for several years. This is based on her method of what she called 'proper mash, not that slop we have to make downstairs'.

She would sit the drained or even slightly mashed potatoes back on the burner if she thought they were going to come out too wet, but if the boil went well, it was an unnecessary step.

She didn't teach me how to cook but, I consider more importantly, how not to be scared of cooking. A lesson I have carried ever since.

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With some minor differences, that's the way I do mash as well. I'll have to try a longer steam on mine to see the difference maybe ;-)

One key difference, I _always_ make extra. That way I have leftovers to make potato scones.

Cold mash, enough plain or bread flour mixed in to make a non sticky dough.

Pat out into thin rounds, say 5mm thick.

Dry fry, flip halfway through, need to be brown not black.

Best fryup accompaniment ever but also go with curries, stews or just buttered with tea.

I've been known to make mash just to have potato scones, I'll do 5 pounds of potatos and freeze the many scones, they reheat from frozen nicely.

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They sound FANTASTIC, Never tried that, but now I will. I also cook way, way too much every time... usually in the hope of bubble and squeak but also just fried in the pan... I'm going to try these scones though!

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Let me know if you like them once you've had a go 😄 I'm sure you will mind

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M. Robuchon did it a little differently: First, pommes 'ratte' - he and his brigade spent a whole day trying 19 different varieties of potatoes, this was the best; boil gently, whole and unpeeled (otherwise the outside absorbs too much water) in salted water. Peel hot. Pass through the ricer/moulin (use an intern for this); dry on a low heat by turning gently with a wooden spoon for five minutes; add a quarter butter by weight of the potato, then a quarter full-fat milk same and whisk, by hand, until unctuous. Simples.

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Ah, that's the full recipe... I didn't know about some parts. Thank you! I have had his potatoes at the Atelier in London and they're fabulous, but almost a whole other thing...

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Mike (can I call you that?), your method is almost the same as that of the great Delia Smith. The Irish make the world’s greatest potato dishes, sod the French. One tip I’ll pass on is to start the mashing with a wooden spatula and then switch to an electric whisk. Saves on time and the end product becomes very creamy, but don’t overdo it. Nobody (apart from the French) wants mash that looks and feels like ultra thick cream.

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You may of course call me Mike, and I'm reassured to hear Delia and I were on the same page... you're right about being a point of creaminess past which one should not go :-)

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The Irish are ABSOLUTELY the masters of potato dishes! Potato bread is a gift from God😁

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I have to go back to Ireland, clearly.

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I have to agree with this. The roasted potatoes I had last Christmas,. courtesy of some visitors from Ireland, were unreal.

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Boil the potatoes in saltwater and if you add cream heat it close to boiling point before adding. Instead of a lid on the pot to keep the contents hot use a folded/thick tea towel. I’ve never done it but have seen a chef stirring in an egg yolk.

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Whoa, good tips. Thank you! Someone else mentioned the salt in the water... that egg yolk idea is intriguing. I'll give it a try!

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As another man of a certain age, raised entirely in England I have similar opinions on this matter and humbly suggest that the application of a potato ricer adds an interesting texture. I don't use it always, but it really does deliver.

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Interesting. I knew about the ricer approach but haven't tried it... thank you, sir.

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Fantastic! This is basically my method only without all the effort, which I expect is why my mash is shitbox. I can see you’re already getting fifth columnists in the comments, though. Do chilli next and see how many of them froth at the mouth and trample one another in their mad dash for the keyboard.

My skill is editing, acquired over forty years of reading, thirty-five years of writing and thirteen years of writing masses of cheap, cheerful content for hire. Want 1500 good words of a comprehensive synopsis condensed to 350 *really* good words that cover exactly the same ground? I can do it for you in twenty minutes and have a wonderful time doing it.

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That's a heck of a skill... and the best part is the pleasure you get from it. I love words, they're my life, but sometimes it can feel like herding recalcitrant sheep into a pen when the back door's been left open...

Trust me, I'm not getting anywhere near the chili debate. Not least because I don't think mine's that great.

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I have a rather gorgeous chilli recipe. It’s probably heretical to the chilli purists out there, but if I wanted to boil a brick of smushed meat and spices in a pot I’d go back to prison and I’ll take you ALL down with me before I let that happen.

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I know I'm being thick, but I'm assuming your moniker is from the Julian May stories? It's a cool ass name!

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Absolutely, and thank you! She’s one of the few writers who I can categorically state is a certified genius (I refuse to accept that someone so huge and full of life is dead). The Saga Of The Exiles/Milieu trilogy are some of my favourite novels of all time, and certainly my favourite eight-book epic sci-fi/fantasy spanning hundreds of characters, thousands of pages, millions of years and billions of light years that needs to be adapted into a longform adult animated series AS THOUGH IT WAS A BESTSELLING GODDAMN MANGA.

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I've read the saga of the exiles about 8 or 9 times, I bloody love them!

I loved the Milieu trilogy but have only read them twice. Diamond Mask is one of only 4 books where I have actually shouted out loud at the plot twist at the end.

I would definitely audition for Marc Remillard!

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I have fantasy cast this non-existent adaptation SO MANY times over the decades, and genuinely believe that I am the only person who knows how to adapt something so massive, complex and gorgeous. Michael Fassbender IS Marc. For now, anyway.

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I don't want to step on the Fassbender toes so I'll have to settle for Nodonn😄

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I excel at eating said potatoes. Thank you for asking.

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It is folks like you that we do it for, and we thank you for your service.

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in addition to a good chunk of butter you need a little fresh ground white pepper and a splash of 'top of the milk'.

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and if you stick a knife into a chunk of spud, lift it out of the water, and it slowly slides off the blade - its done :-)

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Ooh, that's exactly how I do it, and I should have put it in there!

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White pepper - yes! Most under-rated spice in the rack...

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black pepper can be a little overpowering :-)

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I thought my husband was the only one who insists on tickling the potatoes with gentle bubbles for ages and then mashes and beats potatoes with a spoon to a point I fear for his cardiac health!

I would suggest a pinch of nutmeg but that’s just me. :)

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Your husband is exactly correct. Nutmeg... that's an interesting thought!

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Steaming the spuds - so many people are unaware of this top tip.

Thanks for sharing your mash magic.

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You are welcome! And yes, I'm very firm on the steaming as I only figured it out myself about ten years ago and it makes all the difference...

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Apr 28Edited

After walking the Mawwdach estuary one fine day, my friend and I landed at a pub in Barmouth for lunch.

About ten minutes after taking our orders, the waiter came back to inform me that they were "out of mashed potato...would I like some roasted or boiled instead?".

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< sigh >

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Yep. A metric fuck-tonne of butter. Nothing else. Maybe some ground statins.

Only thing I would add is an accidental discovery (like so many good ones; pottery, for example): my other half likes her mash hot-hot. To that end I normally mash (dry, of course) and stir in the butter (and sometimes cheese and diced spring onions, or wholegrain mustard) on a ring that's on high.

One time it caught just a little. Some Maillard action on the bottom of the pan. Not enough to peel off. Just there. And the mash tasted better for that bit of toastiness. So now I flirt with disaster every time for that slightly-toasty yum. You're welcome.

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That is an EXCELLENT tip. I've unofficially/unintentionally done the toasting thing when reheating, and you're right — it's fabulous. Must actually aim for it next time...

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